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Question: How do you know if you and your partner are ready for full swapping?

Dear Lounge Advice,

We've been swinging for about a year now. We have done the FMF play quite a bit, but we have been talking lately about full swap. we know you've heard this one before but we'll put a little bit of a twist on it.

the mr. half (me) is not sure how i will feel when the rubber hits the road so to speak. we talk about it often, and the idea is VERY hot to both of us, but i wonder how (i) we will feel when it comes down to it.

The question is, since we find the idea terribly HOT, is that considered half the battle, or can things take a sudden turn when faced with the actual prospect, and no amount of fantasizing can change that.

Are we more likely to not have the jealousy factor becuase we fantasize about it so much? and have talked infinitum about it. including the fact that either can hit the brakes at any time.

mr. & mrs. nervous.....

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

Frankly, you sound well-prapared to venture into full swap territory. There were a few key things in your e-mail that clued me into this.
First, you've communicated about it extensively. Perfect!! That is THE number one key to any kind of swinging.
Second, you've both actually expressed worry over jealousy. The fact that you've considered that aspect speaks volumes about your communicaton and concern for one another.
Third, you've spoken about being able to hit the brakes if things aren't going as planned. Good!! Many couple think that once the act has started, they're committed.
Every full swap couple has been through this very thing, with the same concerns raging through their heads, but I can safely say from a lot of experience handling these very concerns, that you two are going to be ok.
Don't plan on it happening. If you're open to the idea, and things go that way, just let it flow. When you start planning on these sort of things, it leads to apprehension and uptight feelings laced with unrealistic expectations.
I didn't plan my first full swap. I just happened to be with wonderful open-minded people, and it happened.
If you're fantasizing about it being hot, you're probably going to find your fantasies fulfilled.

As long as you're in love and communicating constantly, you'll go far.

Good luck!!
P.S. I'm always here to hear the follow-up on these adventures, LOL!!

Sincerely,
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