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Question: What should we expect at our first swingers party?

Dear Lounge Advice,

My partner and I are about to go to our first swingers party next weekend. Although this party is supposed to be a "social" and it is being held in a hotel, we don't really know what to expect. Will we be approached to go up to a room?? This is our first step into this lifestyle and we are very excited, but also have many expectations. If we are approached to "play" with a couple will they understand that it is our first time and that we need to take it slow? Seeing that you have been in this lifestyle for many years, how long do you think we should give ourselves before we actually take the plunge with another couple?



Dear (Anonymous),

We actually went to our first Hotel social over New Years Eve so we can now fill you in first hand. Whether you are going to be asked up to someone’s room depends on who you meet and what you say to them during the party. What you have to do as newbies is to just be sure that you discuss what your limitations are and where you are going to draw the line BEFORE you go.

Then while you are socializing you want to be upfront with people (don’t wait till the end o f the night as you don’t want to seem to be leading anyone on) and just explain to them what your rules are for playing. They are all adults there and although it will seem weird at first, its very easy to discuss this with that crowd.

Remember… that this is all about you two having a good time and don’t put some much pressure on yourselves to have to “do something” sexually. You can go there and meet people… mingle… dance…. have a few drinks.. and just have fun without the pressure of even thinking about others.. then go home and fuck the brains out of each other !!!!!

Take baby steps… continue to go to the socials.. and you will be able to answer your last question about when to actually take the plunge yourselves….. you will know.. .and only you will be the ones who can determine the right time.
Have fun… and let us know how it goes !!

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