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Question: My husband seems to have very different reasons for being in the LS

Dear Lounge Advice,

My hubby and I both seem to have different reasons for being in the lifestyle. We are having trouble working it out and any help you could give would be welcome.

He seems to want to have sex with any woman that will let him whether I am interested or not. This causes problems because the SO of the woman then moves in on me. When I tell him he needs to work it out without me, he is ready to drop me and go off with her. I spend alot of time on my own and am tempted to act like a single girl instead of part of a couple because it seems this is what he is doing.

What would you do?
anonymous


Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

I would have a serious talk with him. You're obviously upset about this. Personally, I wouldn't allow us to be in the lifestyle again until something changes. You two need to communicate, and soon. This lifestyle is about both people in the relationship, not just one's selfish ambitions. Plus, from what you're saying, it seems a bit low of him not to have any standards. That just smacks of desperation, and I'm sure it doesn't make you feel any better about yourself knowing that he'll go after anything with a pulse.
You both need to be in agreement about your play, or there's no reason either of you should be in the lifestyle.
He needs to show you more respect than this. Ask him what is more important- you or the lifestyle. If he says that you are the priority, then you should let him know that his actions are speaking more true than his words. His actions right now are saying something quite different.
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