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Question: I played along even though I didn't want to.

Dear Lounge Advice,
WE have been talking to cpls online for about 3 months now and met our first cpl in person last week. We have had threesomes before in the past MFM but that is all. We are both huge flirts and have been together for 12 years. The night we went out we had fun, went to a local bar and had drinks. The week after that same cpl came to our home and had dinner, drinks and got into the hot tub w/ us. The wife of the other cpl was all over my husband, sitting in his lap naked, making out,etc. This came on suddenly and I felt very unprepared. I am not at all attracted to her husband and found it very difficult to see mine kissing, playing and carressing her. I played along for his sake, but ended up crying the whole next day. I have expressed how I feel to him and he is quite angry w/ me because I would like to stop. What should I do?

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

You both should have discussed the game plan beforehand. Your husband (I assume from what you wrote) had no idea that you weren't atracted to the other man. If he didn't know you weren't into this other man, you couldn't expect him to be a mind reader. If you both got into a huttub situation, that's pretty much a green light for play in the lifestyle.

You both seriously need to communicate on what you're comfortable with before you put yourselves in the situation. You shouldn't have 'taken one for the team' if you didn't like what was going on.


I'm sorry to say this sweetie, but this fault lies more on your side.
Decide on the do's and do not's together BEFORE getting into these situations. Then, if a line is crossed anyways, anger and hurt are justified.

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