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Question: Hubby wants separate play b/c I can't find a guy I like

Dear Lounge Advice,

When we signed up on LL, it was to spice up our sex life ... make new friends ... explore my bi-side ... But now, the hubby thinks it is time to play separately ... and I'm just not okay with this. This is on the table because I'm constantly veto-ing couples cause I'm just not attracted to the guy.

AM I being selfish here? Should I just take more for the team? This is a lot harder than I thought it would be.

I guess for some couples it enhances the relationship but could be disastrous for others? Is there any way I can let other couples know I'm not okay with this without looking like an insecure wife? Help? Set me straight?

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

NO! Don't take for the team. He's lucky that you've even considered this lifestyle at all. You could just say no altogether and he's be s*** out of luck altogether. I'm sorry to sound so harsh, but that's the reality of it. If you don't want separate play, then NO WAY! You're in this for both of you. If you're not attracted to the guy, just keep looking until you find someone. It's harder on us women because the guys are harder for us to find. If you're hubby can't be patient with this process, you can just decide to get out of the lifestyle. He needs to be considerate of your needs. Ask him if he would sleep with a toad just so you could get a hot guy. I doubt he would. It's either patience, or no lifestyle. I'lm pretty sure that when presented with this ultimatum, he'll opt to cool his heels until you feel the right vibe. Take the wheel my dear.
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