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Question: Marriage problems

Dear Lounge Advice,

We have been married for 10 years now. My spouse seems to be completely uninterested in Sex, no foreplay and never tries anything new - to the extent that she wouldnt even try sexy clothes.

Our normal sex act would last about 20 mins - and that includes underessing time.

I have also found that she cheated on me for over 3 years with a friend of mine. The lack of sex as well as her unwillingness to change is frustrating as well as disturbing.I have tried talking to her for us to get psyciatric help - doesn't want to.

I love her very much to let her go - but I dont think she loves me.

Any advice for me in this situation?



Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

My advice is not appropriate for this situation. Only the advice of a professional will do in this situation, since it is so serious. Keep on her to see a professional- preferably a marriage counselor. I hope she acquiesces to this. Otherwise, I don't see your marriage lasting.
You do NOT need to be in the lifestyle. This is a very inappropriate place for you given the severity of your situation. If you stay in this lifestyle, you can probably expect your marriage to go further into a downward spiral. Work on yourselves first, then come back if your relationship becomes healthy again.
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