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Question: I want to be with other men...should I pursue this?

Dear Lounge Advice,

I recently had my first encounter with another woman, it was fine, but I still only wnat to be with other men. My boyfriend says he is comfortable with me being with other men as long as we do it together. I think he just wants to be with other women. I am extremely worried that if I am with another man, it would damage our relationship after the fact. Should I believe him and go for it? Part of me says why not, he is giving me the ok to sleep with other men! He has had exprience in the lifestyle before me, but the relationship did not work out. If I continue with other women, I feel like I am doing it for him. Should I risk it?



Dear (Anonymous),

Don't go along with doing other women just for him. If you're not comfortable with that, then there is no reason to continue.
If he is comfortable with you being with other men, then trust his word.
Do you have implicit trust in your relationship?
Are you willing to communicate openly about every facet of this, before AND after things happen?
Do you have a strong bond with your boyfriend that will endure this lifestyle?
IF, and ONLY if you, you can answer yes to all three questions with absolute certainty, then you shouldn't have anything to worry about.
However, if you wish to be with other men, it is only fair that you allow him to be with other women as well. Fair's fair. If you do not think you can handle this without jealousy or insecurity, then you shouldn't be doing anything until you bring that security to the table.
Please talk to him about your concerns. I can advise you to a certain extent, but if you don't voice your concerns to your partner, we will hit a dead end with our resolution.
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