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Question: Does the trust ever come back?

Dear Lounge Advice,
My husband and I met a single woman at a party. After more communication we decided to invite her over. She was very nice and we all had a very good time. A few weeks later I went on a weekend trip away with family. My husband stayed home because of work. After I returned home I was catching up on emails and read one that was not very pleasant. My husband and the single woman had a really good time without me. I confronted him and he told me what happen. I can't really say he told me why he did it. He said it just happened. I know that is not true...things like that do not just happen.
Well it has been a few months now and we have been trying to work it out. Does the trust ever come back? Will I always wonder?
Please help. T



Dear (Anonymous),

In a situation like that, the trust is dificult to gain back. It can be done, but he's going to have work hard to prove that he's trustworthy again. If you had not found that e-mail, would he have ever told you?
You will wonder for a long time. And time is exactly what you both need to overcome this. Hopefully, he won't expect you to regain trust in a short time. That won't happen.
The trust will come back, but that is up to him to establish.
Until such a time, keep communicating. That's the best way to open up the trust lines again. Also, I would recommend that any play in the lifestyle should cease until your relationship is back in order. That is, you probably shouldn't be playing with others until the trust is fully established again.
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