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Question: Owner of local party cornered me alone and wouldn't take no for an answer

Dear Lounge Advice,
We've been attending a local party for a few months and have become good friends with the owner. On our last trip there the owner was being very pushy with me and not taking no for an answer. My husband was playing with another woman in another room and did not see this happen. I felt kind of cornered and was pushing this guy away and telling him no for a long time. When my husband came and found me I was visibly upset, but I did not tell him what happened as he is very likely to have killed the owner. I sent him an email letting him know that kind of behaviour is unnaceptable and never got a response. Should we stop attending these parties? I don't know what to do, especially since it was the owner. We really like the party, we've made a lot of good friends there and would like to keep going, but I now feel kind of betrayed and not comfortable going there.



Dear (Anonymous),

YOu really do need to tell your husband about this. It's completely unacceptable and he needs to know what happened. If you don't tell him, and you get hesitant about going to those parties, then your husband is going to be very confused. Perhaps if you feel that your husband will act rashly, make a pact with him.
If you both decide to go to that party again, make sure your hubby stays by your side at all times and doesn't leave you alone and vulnerable. This way, you can still enjoy the time with your newfound friends and you won't be in the same situation again.

If the owner has the balls to come 'make nice' with you and hubby, one of you can calmly tell him that you're both only there because you have friends, then decide what else you would like to tell him. I'd just tell him off,personally. Let him know that his behavior won't be tolerated, and others will know about it. This will hurt his business, which I'm sure he won't want.

If you truly don't feel comfortable going again, tell your friends why. But still tell your husband what happened. Perhaps by alerting your friends, they will be aware of this sleazebag's motives.

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