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Question: Dealing with a woman who is 'not so fresh'

Dear Lounge Advice, Recently my wife and I were playing at a swing club. She started playing with a woman from a couple that was standing next to us. Suddenly she realized that there was a horrific odor coming from this womans pussy. Fortunately we were able to escape from them, but what if we were unable to? What is the proper protocol when your in a room where other people can hear what your saying? If we were to tell them "sorry Baby your pussy smells ridiculous" it would be an awful buzz kill and might just clear out the room. What should we do?

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

If it's that bad of an odor, it's probably an infection. Normal sweaty nether regions don't usually produce a terrible smell.
Whisper in her ear-
Be very nice and sincere and just say
"Honey, I think you might have an infection down there that you're not aware of.
I better not mess around with you down there because I don't want to make it worse."

Yes, she'll be embarassed, but you will have handled it with kindness, allowing her to keep some semblance of dignity intact. She may even admire your candor.

If you are in the process of going down and notice it, there are a couple things you can do.
Here's one: "Ya know, I feel so sweaty from dancing and walking around in these clothes all night. I think that we should hop in the shower and have a little fun cleaning each other in there before we play."
Then you lead her to the shower and partake in some erotic washing.
Another: Do the finger test. Drag your fingers lightly across the offending area and subtly bring them up close to her nose. You'll have to improvise this and not be obvious. But, maybe she will catch a whiff of herself and pause play for a moment to freshen up. If that doesn't work, try to above shower scenario. If the shower scenario doesn't work, you'll either have to excuse yourself politely from or choose to be honest with her.

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