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Question: Trying to improve, but getting no respect

Dear Lounge Advice,

I'm kind of frustrated these days! I've always been on the skinny side, averaging around 140 to 150 lbs., and been on the shy side too. Well I'm 52 years young and in August of 2006 I had 4 vertebra replaced in my neck and I should have been paralyzed from the neck down, and I have no friends anymore. And after a 9-day stay in the hospital, well one can imagine, I weight 137 lbs. Now Iíve surprised everybody in my family and Iíve even surprised my self. Iíve quite smoking after 30 years, Iím going to college, and I workout three times a week, at the gym. Well I feel great and I now weigh 160 lbs. Iím not done yet!!! My goals are to graduate in 2010 and gain another 20 to 25 lbs. as needed.

Now I'm trying to fit back into society and enjoy life. But I'm getting a lot of woman that think I'm ugly, a low-life, a perv and how knows what else. I know I'm none of those things as a matter of fact I'm quite the opposite. I'm one of those nice guys that gets no respect!!

This is really affecting my self-esteem if you know what I mean? So with me turning my life around in a full circle like I have how can I change my lady problem around too??? Heck I know Iím not a ďGQĒ model. But I am trying to improve.

Bill W.



Dear (Anonymous),

Can I be perfectly honest with you Bill?
Please don't get offended, but I don't think that the pictures you have on your profile flatter you much. You may want to think about looking into new pictures to post.
Also, leave the Photoshopped effects out of your photos because they do not put forth the air of masculinity.

Since it sounds like you've been making a lot of gains in the gym, I'd suggest that perhaps you continue to do this until you feel confident with yourself. Then, rejoin the lifestyle with pictures of the fabulous new you. Confidence is a huge turnon, so you may just need to step back for a few months until you regain this. Then, you may experience more success in this LS if you're serious about pursuing it.
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