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Question: WTF???

Dear Lounge Advice,

Hi Robyn,
I have somewhat of a strange question or problem.

I have 3 nipples.
This third nipple is not just a mole, it is a nipple, with areola and hair and all. It is very sensitive and I get highly aroused when it is touched or played with. I like my third nipple.

My problem is.
I feel weird taking my shirt off when we are about to get down with another couple. I do not know how the other woman is going to re-act to my third nipple.

I would feel more comfortable if my third nipple was on my chest, but its on my back.

any suggestions?

Sincerely,
Please fondle my back nipple

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

WTF?

You're telling me that your third nipple is sensitive. Correct?

Yet, you openly admit that you're ashamed to show it in front of others? How the hell do you think that third nipple feels?

Don't treat it like a wheel. Third wheels always feel left out. Include it. Tell it you love it. Stroke it. Make it your bitch. Put the other two nipples in their place. (Well, they're already in their place, but humor me here, would ya)

Yes, your third nipple rides the short bus. So what. It has feelings. Especially when cold air hits it.

WHAT is your problem?? Have a freakin' heart.
When a hot girl walks behind you and you're not looking, who has your back? Who????

That's right bitch. That third nipple hardens up and alerts you to some hot ass that YOU (or your two "chest best" friends) wouldn't have noticed otherwise.

So get off its back. No fricking pun intended.
Let your back nipple get your back. Afterall, your two front nips are sitting on man-boobs, so you have no right to be ashamed of the cold hard truth.


You need your tri-mam-man-nip.
So shut up and be a man, Mr. SLIDERX.






Yes, I know you who are. As usual.
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