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Question: As a single female, I feel like an invited guest

Dear Lounge Advice, I'm the one who asked about threesomes, and I wonder if I should watch porn to get more hints?

I'm really curious about whether or not couples like the single female they have just invited into their fantasy to suddenly speak up and say what SHE wants, when, in most cases, I feel like an invited guest.

I REALLY feel like the kickstand, third wheel, extra hoola hoop a lot of the time...which is ok, but, I would LOVE some advice on how to be the kind of "strong" woman that I think couples really like!




Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

Watching porn for some tips isn't such a bad idea.

Let me preface the advice I'm about to give with a small disclaimer.
I'm am not an advocate of the single female feeling superior or better than other simply because of her status, but with that being said, here's what I'd like you to keep in mind. I'm sure you already understand what I am about to say, but perhaps you need to hear it from another.

Many couples seek out a single female. You are, essentially, a hot commodity when it comes to 'swinger supply and demand'. Many want it, yet so few single females exact in proportion to the general poulation.
Any couple that has a single female in their bed has beat the odds and should feel a bit lucky that they are experiencing something that many others still seek.


Of course, it is a privilege for you to be invited into their bedroom as well. It's wonderful that you are trying to observe a certain etiquette by not wanting to take control when you are a guest in their bedroom.

I'm not Dear Abby of the vanilla world.
I'm Ask Robyn of this world. So I'm going to give you an etiquette crushing answer.

It's a threesome! You're all in there to fulfill your dirty fantasies. Quit worrying about whose bedroom it is and get nasty. Stop trying to be Miss Manners. You're there to F-U-C-K.

Hell, if you're still uncomfortable taking charge in their bed, shell out some money and buy a hotel room for a night. That way, you'll feel more in-charge and you can lead the night.
Perhaps that's just what you need to break yourself into the area of domination. I'll bet my next paycheck that they'll LOVE the idea, and they'll get to see a brand new you.
Changing things up is the key to keeping the hot sex vibes flowing.


Remember, their fantasy would remain as a fantasy if you weren't willing to provide the key to unlock it. Dangle that key and make 'em earn it!

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