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Question: How do you deal with the feeling of guilt when full swapping?

Dear Lounge Advice,
Hi you 2.Firstlly let me tell ya that your portion on this site is awesome.

My question is my wife is warm to the idea of soft swing,but still has a hang up about feeling guilty and a bit jealous.Could you give us some ideas on how to get over that hump.We talk about our fantasys often and our sex life is very good.We did however have a expeirence about 2 years ago that troubled my wife because she felt she cheeted on me and me on her.We had same room full swap sex with another couple.It wa sour first time and we were a bit tipsy to say the least.

We love each other more than anything but somehow we cant get her past the point of guilt and some jealousy.

We are naturists and have done the hedo3 thing and that was all fine but the next step just seems to elude us.

Thanks for listening.

Yummy!

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

Thank you for the very nice compliments....

For some people it takes a while longer than for others to "get it." What we mean is it takes some people longer to realize that when you are playing with others its just that... play.... and that it is something that the two of you are doing together as a couple.. and not as individuals.

When you start, for some its just easy to "jump right into the pool".. while others find it easier to just get their feet wet by observing... then doing some soft swap.. and then full swap.

You guys seemed to have dived right into the deep end right way... and maybe it was a harsh reality that she is still dealing with...

We dont know what is available where you live as far as couples clubs or socials, etc... but what you may wish to try is go back to square one... and take things real slow... assuring her all along the way that you are there for her... and this is all about the two of you.

There have been plenty of times that we will be with a bunch of people.. and are just happy to be with each other... especially with the others looking on... or us watching them.

What you need to do is assure her that what you are doing is not a threat at all.. and communicate.. in fact.. overcommunicate.. but most of all... slow down big boy.... maybe the first time the water was way too cold for her.
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