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Question: Should I ask the partner before playing?

Dear Lounge Advice,
i was at a party. the male half of a married couple was getting fresh and wanted to leave to private quarters in short order.

i was willing and wanting. should i have checked in with the mans wife to see if she was okay with this quick movement and play that wasn't including her. or would i assume that if he is good to go at a hotel party like this then that's between them. i would hope they have their agreements in place and this is not for me to sort out.



Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

Really, what he decided to do, regardless of his mate's preferences, should not be your concern.

We all assume that in this lifestyle, that if we are approached, that there is consent.

But alas, that isn't always the case.

Therefore, I recommend that in this case, you always check with his/her partner.

Not only does this ensure that you don't get caught in a web of drama, but it also ensures that you secure peace of mind and respect from the partner.

If the partner *is* completely okay with this situation, at least you will leave a great impression with him/her by extending the respect of asking first.
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