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Question: Trust issues

Dear Lounge Advice,

My boyfriend and I have had some serious trust issues. Since we have been together, I have caught him texting or IM'ing people and having sexual conversation with them. Some of the people, he has had casual relations with. Although none of it is inviting them to have sex together, it still bothers me that he is doing it behind my back and the feeling that I am somehow not enough. However, if he told me about it, I would probably be just as irritated so it's a no-win for him. He knows how much it bothers me but refuses to do much to change except probably getting more creative about hiding it. He swears that he just likes talking to people but would never want to be with them, only me. I don't know what to do and feel like I can't hanle it. Am I being irrational?



Dear (Anonymous),

You're not being irrational. It would bother most people. You've already confronted him, which would have been my first piece of advice. So, you have to make a decision at this point. You can accept this about him and just deal with it. Obviously, it's already causing you considerable pain. Or, you don't have to deal with it, and you know where that leaves you.
If you can't trust the guy, is sticking around worth it for you? Are you willing to pt up with this? Do you want to be in a relationship that is devoid of trust? Afterall, that's the foundation.
You need to make your decision based on you, and you alone. But knowing that you can't trust him, if you stay with him, you will have no more room to complain anymore.

Obviously, he doesn't respect you enough to abide by this simple wish. Do you have more respect for yourself than he has for you?
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