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Question: Tired of kissing frogs and getting my feelings hurt everytime.

Dear Lounge Advice,

We have been in the "lifestyle" for about 5 years now. We have not played with many couples in the 5 years (less then 10). We are both open and honest about who we are but people still will talk to us for a while via email and phone even meet with them a couple of times (no playing) and when we are ready to play we never hear from them again. We have been open from the start that we dont like to play on the first meeting and that we like to be friends before we play to make sure we all "like each other".

I am not what most couples think of as HWP but the weight I have I carry it well I have a nice figure and no major fat rolls. For a lady with natural bust I also have the natural hips that even me out and a slender waist. Barbie and Ken might live in our house it is just not us (they are dolls that kids play with not real people)

We know that one day we will find the "right" couple who will accept us for us as we are. We just want to know how to get rid of the ones who will play with our feelings make fools of us. I know you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find the prince but i am tired of kissing frogs and getting my feelings hurt everytime..



Dear (Anonymous),

The "Lifestyle" is filled with different couples with different ideas of what they are looking for and different rules that work for themselves. The only correct rules are the ones that work for you.

If you understand why other couples may act one way or another... you may not take those actions so personally.... so here is a look at the other side.

We for instance are not interested in getting so close to another couple. For us, we like the spontineity and like to go by how we feel at the moment. We have several "friends" in the lifestyle... most whom we have never been physical with...

For us the sex is just playing.. and we are not interested in building a big relationship.

That is not to say that one way is better than the other or one is right and one is wrong... but you have to respect and understand others may not feel exactly the same way you guys do.

You are also expecting a lot from others... everything seems to be on your timetable... which is fine for you guys...nothing wrong with that... but its obviously harder to find an exact match.

Endure the time it takes... and dont take things too personally !
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