Home   New Mail!  Contacts  Who's Online  Friends  Search  Advice  Forum  Blogs  Groups  Mall  Chat  My Account  Clubs  Travel  Login  
  9 members in chat16 in bOOty Call
Lifestyle Sexual Advice
We have tried Bi sites and have not had any luck.
Does DP increase the chance of a vaginal infection?
more sexual advice advice
Lifestyle Etiquette
PTSD:What can I do to help make events more consistently enjoyable for me
We are both new to this....
more etiquette advice
Relationship Advice
I just don't know what to do anymore?
kept for memories....?
more relationship advice
Friendships, Clubs & More...
I would like to be able to meet bisexual females in Santa Monica west side area
Does my large size stop me from doing this?
more friendship advice
Question: Is it harmful or weird to

Dear Lounge Advice,

We are fairly new to this lifestyle. We e-mail many couples, trying to build friendships with people in the lifestyle. Recently, we have met a couple that we have much in common with, love their company, and have swapped once. We absolutely adore them and the feeling seems to be mutual. Our question is: Is it harmful or weird to "fall in love" as a couple with another couple?

We also feel uneasy about answering other couples' ads, or even telling them that we have done so. Are we going to a bad place, or is how we're feeling, something that sometimes happens?


A & R



Dear (Anonymous),

You have only been with this couple once physically and you are "falling in love" with them??

First of all don't feel too weird as we have seen this happen before.... is it harmful? NO... Are you going to a bad place? In our experience... YES.

If you decide that you are happy with this couple and don't want to persue others right now that is one thing.. but to feel guilty about it or to feel like you are doing something behind their backs is a major red flag.

The only people that you owe anything to are the two of you. The truth of the matter is that couples come and go... people who you think will be your best friends forever will one day fade away into the background. You have to trust us on this.

In our experience if you get too close to any one couple you will see a lot of emotions come into play and you will start affording these people some of the emotional energy that should only be reserved for your spouse.

Lets face it.. it aint easy staying married these days and it requires a lot of time, energy and attention. Don't mix up what is supposed to be explorations with commitments and emotional connections.

We have seen couples become so close and the emotions that bind them together become so blurred between four of them.. that ultimately they swapped entire marriages. And this has happened to more than a few couples we have known.

In their cases perhaps it was not the worst thing in the world... but we strongly feel that bringing other people into the mix is hard enough... establishing such strong emotional ties that you become a manogamous foursome is dangerous.

Remember this is all supposed to be about having fun !!

Click here to view Lounge Advice archives
100's of answers to your lifestyle questions can be found here!