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Question: She is attracted to my man, my man is attracted to her, her man is attracted to me, but I am NOT attracted to him. What should I do?

Dear Lounge Advice,

My husband and I have met this awesome couple. The female and I are VERY attracted to eachother although we have not had a chance to "PLAY" It is apparant that she finds my husband attractive and her husband finds me attractive as well. Honestly though, there is NO attraction to him what-so-ever. How do you explain that? The same room sex would be fine however anything that would go on between her and I, I would not want any involvement from him at all. I would not let my husband get involved either due to the unfairness. How does one explain that without hurting the feelings of her husband? It is sad, there are so many VERY good looking woman yet the men are unattractive, to me at least

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

Like us, if you and your hubby only play as a couple then in the future you should assume that most other couples are that way too... and... if you or your hubby are not attracted to one part of a pair... move on.... or this is gonna crop up time after time.

SO many times we have seen really hot women with men that we didnt find attraction to... but you just have to accept that and forget it.

In this particular situation you have a couple of ways to go.

It is pretty brutal to out and out say that you are not attracted to one of them, unless you are put in a bad situation and you absolutely must... there are easier ways of getting out of the situation without even having to nick anyone's feelings... just by telling them you want to be friends but really dont feel like you want to be physical. If you have had some sexual chemistry with the woman... her intuition will tell her the story.

The other way you may wish to try, and this is totally up to you (we wont advise going either way) is to tell a little white lie that really wont hurt anyone.

You can tell them that you are only really into girl play. If they know already that you are not just into that.. you can tell them that you really have to be friends for a long long time before you do anything with other spouses.

That is really just if you really feel strongly about being with the woman.. if you are going to see these people often and continue a very close friendship... you are going to be eating that white lie in the future !!!

This is all about a moment... couples come and go.. and unfortunately situations dont always work out as we plan them.. but you have to learn to roll with the punches and just move on.

Finding two people that are compatible is hard enough... finding 4 sometimes seems like it is impossible.

Good luck in whatever direction you decide to take.. let us know how it goes..
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