Home   New Mail!  Contacts  Who's Online  Friends  Search  Advice  Forum  Blogs  Groups  Mall  Chat  My Account  Clubs  Travel  Login  
  23 members in chat32 in bOOty Call
 
Lifestyle Sexual Advice
Play Bi Play
New(bie) Adventures
more sexual advice advice
Lifestyle Etiquette
Honesty vs. Vague Truths
Calling All Unicorns
more etiquette advice
Relationship Advice
To Swing or Not to Swing...
Please Communicate Desires
more relationship advice
Friendships, Clubs & More...
Blocking
Sending IMs
more friendship advice
  
Question: I'd like to explore, but he doesn't seem open

Dear Lounge Advice,

I have gotten to the point in my life where I want/need a change. I've been curious about different lifestyles for years. I really want to visit our local swingers club and experience new things. I am married and my husband doesn't seem very interested in the idea. If i can persuade him to go at least once and i want to try something, i know he would probally be angry. I know he wouldn't let me visit alone. What can I do?

Sincerely,

(Anonymous)

  
Dear (Anonymous),

All you can really do is sit down with him and express your desires to him. Think of a list of positive reasons that would come of this and present it to him rationally. Be sure not to approach it with too much emotion because not only will that emotional state cloud your head, but it will probably muddy up your discussion and you will go nowhere. You don't have to bring up doing anything with anyone. Start with baby steps and just suggest attending a club to do some people watching, just to shake things up. Depending on how he reacts to that, gauge where you want to go with it. Not too fast though. It may come off as pushy and you not wanting to be with him. People often begin to wonder when their spouse brings up this type of scenario. Often, someone wonders why their significant other wants to do something with another person, and they begin wondering why they aren't 'enough'. Reassure him that he IS enough, but that you want to explore. Approach cautiously and with care.
Click here to view Lounge Advice archives
100's of answers to your lifestyle questions can be found here!