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Question: Am I gay, bisexual or?

Dear Lounge Advice,
I have a anal sex problem. I like dildos and vibrators and basically everything ass related. My wife thinks Iím a gay bottom that is always going to be a girl wanna be and hates the fact that I would get fucked by a another guy and basically become the woman getting fucked and she would have to see that her man is completely helpless to another manís cock penetrating me. I have a certain amount of female aspects about myself and my sexuality change d along time ago but Iím still a man who loves all sexy pretty and horny females in general. I have experienced quite slot of anal practice solo while in my bedroom and in front of a mirror and by a man who knew that I wanted the real thing and had me convinced that I wanted to be a girl while I was getting fucked. I always use to where girls panties and practice how much I could take by buying toys and using them for the pure feelings of how it made me feel inside to how I looked while it was happening to me. My wife wants me to stop watching gay porn and thinks I have other guys who are in a circle that are in craigs list just to rear end me. I t is so confusing that she thinks Iím so gay that I am always posting pics and emails all the time when I have actually been keeping my act straight and only think and want to do something with her in that manor. We have in the past went far as the role reversal goes and me be on her end of the dildo. She has been trying before to accept my obsession of anal practice but hates that it makes me look like a sissyboy who only wants dick in his life but Iím so obsessed with her desires too. I feel like a confused little kid trying to break out of my shame. If only she would be accepted by the fact that Iím a anal type that likes to feel his prostate confidential orgasm. Cause honestly itís between us. But thus has a hold on us both and we some advice on the matter.



Dear (Anonymous),

It sounds like you are one of two categories.

I donít believe you are gay, and just because you like anal doesnít make you gay NOR a ísissy boyí unless you act like a ísissy boyí. Art ya acting like a sissy boy? ;)

Either you are a bisexual that truly likes both men AND women, but your inclination is to build true, loving long term and sexual relationships with women, then you need to accept that and explain that to your wife. That doesnít mean that SHE needs to accept that, because thatís not quite what she married into. So please understand if she reacts adversely to this and doesnít want to keep your relationship the same, then itís understandable.
And in the long run itís better for both of you, because if you continue this way, youíll both be miserable.

The other option is that youíre a straight male who enjoys anal sex, which their are plenty of, period. You tried once with a man to see what that would be like. If you enjoyed that experience and canít wait to have that again, then youíre definitely bi sexual (refer back to my first classification)
But if not, you simply enjoy anal play. If this is the case, you need to sit down and have an open and honest conversation with your wife about how you feel, how she feels, and come to some sort of compromise and resolution that makes you two happy, even if that means you both go your separate ways.

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