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   What is the best sartorial alternative for the stylin' swinger to wear...  

11/2/2013 08:19
Posted By:  - SALT LAKE CITY, UT  
Date Posted: 11/2/2013 08:19
...in lieu of his tight, phat, EH and Affliction clubwear? In abject shame I've had to give all my totally bitchin' Ed Hardy and Affliction clothes to Deseret Industries (that's like Good Will for those who aren't from Utah or Southeast Idaho except the proceeds go towards building ginormous white members only clubs on prominent hillsides in most major cities...and to defeat gay marriage initiatives). But I digress. So what's a swinger to wear? The "ladies" can get away with just about anything as long as it makes them look like a hooker who just hit a small/extra small clearance sale at Dr. Johns. I'm lookin' into buyin' one of those badass suits that are on fire from The Hunger Games. The first three prototypes I built in my garage didn't quite work out like I'd hoped.  So what is it? What should us "doods" wear? And don't say "I like a man in a t-shirt and jeans and boots because despite your ridiculously outdated cowboy fantasy, there are few clubs (except one in Buttfuck, South Dakota) that will let The Marlboro Man past the velvet rope wearing that shit.

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